lover...fighter...lover...

Paul, I think I told you, I'm a lover not a fighter
(the girl is mine - michael jackson & paul mccartney)

would it be nice, if we, can find, a true lover that also a fighter in life...
i mean, based on my friend story (la niña story), all the men in her life, i consider had failed to be a fighter in life, at least for their relationship.

as for me from my past dramas...
d 1st, he was a fighter, but he was a possessive fighter that scared me to death... in this case, i walked away!

d 2nd, he wasn't a fighter type, he loved peace. till one time, i realized, he didn't fight for us that us that much. so, i passed him by...

d 3rd, he was a real fighter for us... i loved the way he fought for us, but so ashamed, that he never fought for his own life...

d 4th, he was a real fighter, i mean a real fighter. he could beat up ten guys at once. he had this skill to knock people out in seconds. but, things just didn't work out. he didn't want us anyway... he thought i was more "fighter" for him. hehehe...

d 5th, never got the chance to know him better.. it was my fault tho'. he could be a fighter, but i let the chance slipped away... becoz of... (to the next line, plz)

d 6th, he, once i thought, was a true fighter. he once put me on the first list, i was his number one priority and made me feel overjoyed! but life did change. someone or something just take my place... then, i had to fight my painful life, nights and days...

d 7th, for all i know, for all i wish for, he had the willing to fight, he just hadn't done it (yet)...

as for me,
still wishing hard... still do!

(baru tereak dari pemancar di lantai 24 sambil liat masih macetnya sudirman -so beautiful from the bird's eye view- ...gw tereak... "i'm stating i don't wanna stop wishing! but for now, i allow my 'fighting session' to take 'siesta' for a while...Woo-hoooo...")